This is a letter from a young meri Samarai (Milne Bay - PNG ) writing to her boyfriend working in town

Oh my Dear Darin,
 When you go my heart pain coz I love you so much 
Always remember that you got my good thing with you
& I got your good thing with me.
 Please you must not do another girl Ooh darin darin,
 Yu stap parawei,.........I stap parawei,
 You lava me............. I lava yu!
 Whatever you do ............. I do!
 Where-ever you go ............... I go,
 and where-ever you are.... I are!
 So plis darin when yu kam don giv me a chance just spear me to death!! 

'I beg your pardon' translated incorrectly

In a local village in Vanuatu a father decided that the fastest way to get his 11 year old son to learn English for his studies in school would be to have him on weekends in their coconut thatched roof artifact stand {shop} and be the point of contact with tourists wanting to buy local artifacts. The father would be standing behind him, nearby in case a tourist uses some high level English terms not familiar with the boy, so he can clarify to him. In one occasion, a tourist wishing to buy a carving asks the young boy, who made the fine carving to which the boy responds with a name. Unsure if she heard it correctly, the tourist responded “I beg your pardon”. The young boy was now lost with this new English phrase, leaned back, signaling to his advisor at the back that he is lost and needed instant help. The father calmly leans forward and whispers to his ears “button up your shirt”.

Big Fingers instead of Big Arm

 

A tourist cruise ship called in to one of the Vanuatu remote islands for tourists to enjoy its white sandy beaches. A tourist with muscular biceps covered in tattoo was walking along the beach when one of the local villagers in that area, tried to start a friendly conversation but first wanted to complement the visitor of his muscular big arms, raced up to the male tourist, and patted his huge arms in awe and complimented ‘big fingers’.